Batter

Are You a Leftie or Not?

In case you haven’t noticed, Baseball season is upon us.  While watching the Indians game last night with hubby, I thought of an occurrence back in the day that “Tickled” me – then just turned me into a laughing fool as I tried to retell it to him.


Back in my late teens/early twenties, my girlfriend asked me to join her softball team as they needed more players.  I thought, “yeah, why not? That sounds like fun!”  And so I did.


I had never played on an organized and somewhat “official” team other than in gym class, so I would be considered a rookie.  A rather wet-behind-the-ears rookie at that.


Our coaches, Mr. B and Woody, were the most gentle, helpful and extremely patient coaches I think I have ever met or seen.  Of course, they probably needed to be so with a team of estrogen like ours!


Now, let’s be honest here.  I am a competitive type, but I have to admit that I only joined for the fun.  I’m always a party ready to happen. And truth be told, I wasn’t “in it to win it”! The other thing you need to know is that I am right handed.  Just sayin’!


We went through a few weeks of practices.  We did drills on catching, batting, trying everyone new out in positions to see where the right fit was.  Some were seasoned players and they knew where they would be.  The rest of us needed to be figured out.  I, personally, was looking for where I could find the most conversation!  HaHa  Needless to say, when they put me in Left Field the first game or two, I quickly told them it was not a good fit.  I mean, c’mon, do you ever see much fun happening out there?


I found a new home at Home Plate.  I became the Catcher.  Mr. B. decided to try me out there.  I liked it.  Except when we had the grumpy ol’ umpire that didn’t want to know what my day was like, geesh!


We were doing okay as far as wins/losses.  Weren’t the number one team, but weren’t the last place team either.  Then came the day when we had an away game.  We went out for some warm-ups, did some catching from the coaches and got ready to play.  


Then it’s my turn for my first “at bat”.


I walked up to the plate and stood to the right of the umpire and catcher.  All at once I hear my coach yell my name and I turned around.  Mr. B is shrugging his shoulders and has his hands up in the air.  I yelled back,  “isn’t it my turn?”


I turned back around and heard my team mates yelling, so I turned back to the bench again.  They were all waving their hands in a gesture that I translated to mean – hit it way out there. I wave back and yelled, “I got it!”


The umpire grumbles, “you ready?”


I said, “yep, let’s go!”


The pitcher pitched the ball and I hit it way out into center field.  I flung my bat and took off for first base.  I’m safe.  I looked back at the bench thinking they will be excited for me and they are all laughing and shaking their heads.  Both coaches are just smiling and shaking their heads as well.  Of course, I’m wanting to walk over and find out what’s so funny, but I have to wait.  And wait…


Next girl up, sent it over the fence and off I went.  She made it to third, I crossed home plate.


Huffing and puffing as I got to the bench, then Mr. B came over to me and said, “tell me, what hand do you write with? Are you a leftie?”


I replied, “no, I write with my right hand, why?”


At this point, he threw his hands in the air, threw his head back and laughed.  I looked over at the other coach, Woody, and he had his hand over his eyes, with his head down and is shaking his head.


I looked at the girls on the bench and they were all laughing.  I have now gotten ticked because nobody is letting me on this little joke.  I yelled, “what the heck is everybody laughing at?”  


Mr. B finally composes and said, “why did you walk up to that side of the plate?”


I replied, “what do you mean that side of the plate?”


Mr. B said, “if you are right handed, why did you walk up to that side of home plate?”


I looked at the bench and they are dying.  I looked back at the coaches and said in all seriousness, “well, when I walk over to home plate from the bench, I always walk right up to home plate, stand there and wait for a pitch.  That’s what I did today, what’s wrong with that?”


Well, everyone caught the problem but me!  Mr. B shook his head again and says, “well, if that works for you, just keep doing it!”  Then walked away shaking his head.


I finally am frustrated enough and asked coach Woody, “I’m not catching this, what was the problem?”


Woody, with the straightest face he could said, “well, this is the first game we have been on this side of home plate and you walked up to the plate and batted left handed.”


I pondered this enlightenment a moment, and then replied, “Oh.”


I have to say that when I got up for my second at bat, the pitcher was confused as all get out as I went to the correct side of home plate for a right handed batter.  She looked over at her coach as he checked his book, looked at me, looked at the book and just shook his head.


Yeah, I hit that ball that was pitched to me, too.


And made it to second base.


So there.


…and that’s all I have to say about that.


Tammy