laughter

Oh No He Didn’t!

Posted on by Tammy

I am the kind of person who likes to plan things out.  However, I do have a side that just loves to do something on the spur of the moment, too.  Usually in search of laughter!  I’m not so rigid that life passes me by while I sort out details to the ‘nth degree, yet on the flip side I don’t throw caution to the wind on a regular basis.  Yet, through all of this, I am still quite an ornery girl to say the least.  Again, all in search of a great laugh.

Through the years I’ve have worked hard to go from an A++ personality to a somewhat comfortable B+/A- depending on the day!  This is much to my family’s urging to “lighten up a little, geez!”

On a positive side, being married to a person who was most definitely NOT a spur of the moment kind of guy, I have been able to bring some lighthearted fun into his life as well.  So when we witnessed the event I will share below, I’m not sure that my pulling him out of his  shell was necessarily a good thing.  You’ll see what I mean.

A few years back we took a vacation beginning in Florida at Universal Studios, met up with friends and shared a huge condo at Outer Banks a week,  and added a quick weekend stop in Maryland to visit my hubby’s cousins on our way back to Ohio.  Since we are three only children, we let our daughter take along her friend.

The girls were 12.  You know the age, everything a parent does or says is quite ridiculous!  Though we, as the parents, did our very best to behave ourselves and didn’t embarrass them too much.  Well, at least that’s our story!  Until we got to Maryland.  Ahem…..

The four of us were doing a little shopping at a retail store.  We had been in the store for a while and were about to leave.  Apparently, one of us had become bored.  This person either decided to get a little adventurous or lost their flippin’ mind!  Mind you, the one who decided to do this little deed, is not the spontaneous, ornery, silly one in the pair.  So to see what happened next, still brings laughter to the three of us at the very mention or sight of this particular object anywhere today.

The three of us girls in the group were making our way to the register area to exit the store.  The male in the group had been lingering in this area for way too long.  Obviously!  You’ll see.

As we approach the area, we are still sort of shopping as we pass the tables at the front filled with merchandise.  Then all at once we hear a snap, a gasp from another direction and this little statement coming from the male we are now wishing was not with us… “I think it’s broke,” as he hands her the broken chair.

Ya think?

The facial expression on the teen cashier was priceless.  Here is a grown man, trying to sit in a child’s resin chair that was sitting by the register. Her mouth is hanging down far enough she could catch flies. She just looks at us without a word.

We left the store and I look back at the two 12 year olds behind me.  Yeah, they wanted to crawl into any hole and die.  Nobody has said a word.

We get to the car, climb in and close the doors.  The male in the car starts to giggle and then says, “Hmm, I guess I’m too big for that chair.”

Genius!

We then just laugh.  What in the world was he thinking?  Why on earth would he, the logical one, even TRY to fit an adult booty into a child’s chair?  Oh. My!

To this day, when we see a child’s resin chair, the daughter or I will quickly say, “NO, don’t even think about it.”  This makes people look at us rather strange wondering why we have to tell a grown man why he cannot sit in that little, itty bitty chair!  If they only knew….

Am I trying to tell you not to be spontaneous?  No way!  I think the lesson learned here would be this:  spontaneous is great, but maybe a little assessment of the end result might be wise.  Especially when you are with your teenagers who just may die of embarrassment!

…and that’s all I have to say about that!

Tammy

What A Strange Looking Bride…..A Little Manly Actually!

Posted on by Tammy
Last Monday, September 12th, my hubby and I celebrated our 30th Anniversary.  Hooray for us!  With both of us being only children, many of our friends and family had doubts that two spoiled, only children would be able to make it work.  Did I ever tell you I love a challenge?  Another post…another day!

I was looking at our wedding pictures and recalling the events of the day.  Yes, I really can remember much of the day from start to finish.  I was looking at my dress, the bargain of the event, and it brought to mind a funny story about my dress.

Back in 1990, our Adult Sunday School class had a class event.  We decided to do a night of “Let’s Make a Deal.”  Do any of you reading this remember that show?   It was a show on TV where Bob Barker would ask for an item, usually weird like a white plastic fork, and then deal with the folks for hidden items on stage.  It was pretty funny.

Part of the show was to be dressed up in such a way to get Bob’s attention as well.  He may be struck by your outfit and just come up and try to wheel and deal with you just because you caught his eye.  Such was the case for our class.  We ALL had to come dressed up, toting a bag of dealing items.  We had a “Bob Barker” named Ray, and a beautiful stage assistant named Brenda!

Well, the hubster and I couldn’t decide what we were going to dress up as for the event, but we kept on thinking.  One day, I had an idea but I just knew he wouldn’t go along with it.  I pitched it anyway.  Boy was I surprised!  He not only went along with he, he elaborated on it!  We decided to go as a bride and groom.  One difference.  He was the bride and I was the groom!

We dropped our daughter off at my Mom’s who lived by the church and we decided to get dressed there.  My Mom took pictures (see below) so I have proof that my hubby can wear a bridal gown quite well!
As we were on the front porch taking pictures, people would go by and honk, then do a double take.  It wasn’t quite the Bride and Groom they thought were standing there posing!  But it gets better….

Since my hubby’s legs were quite wrapped up in the train on my dress, I drove us to the church.  On the expressway it all began.  As I’m driving, I look up in the rearview mirror and see two young girls, maybe late teens early twenties and they realized that there is a “bride” in the car so they whip around and come up on the driver’s side of the car and slow down.  They are all smiling and waving and honking the horn and I wave.  Then my hubby leans forward, turns their way, smiles and waves at them, too.  As you will notice in the photo, the hubster’s face was, well, a little fuzzier than probably most brides would have been.  Both girls’ mouths dropped.  They slowly stopped waving and put their hands down.  The driver guns it and takes off.  The two of us in our car start busting out laughing.  And there’s more…

We arrive at the church.  We attend a large church, but the old part of the church is where they do weddings, in fact where we were married 30 years ago.  That happens to also be the parking lot we were parking in to go to the area where our class was meeting.  Then it happened.

We got out of the car. I help hubby “fix” himself as he has, um, filled out the bodice part of his dress and he’s a little lopsided if you know what I mean.  As we finish adjusting everything we notice two sweet little old ladies get out of their car.  We realized that they are going to the real wedding that will be happening and it’s obvious they are not from the bride’s side of the family.  They were walking together, arm in arm and had stopped to see the precious, sweet bride.  They waved at me and smiled and were waiting for the bride to come around the car.  And he did.

The look on their faces was priceless.  Both their mouths dropped clear to the asphalt!  Their eyes nearly bugged out of their sockets.  Then as quickly as they made the faces, they closed their mouths, huddled close together and scurried quickly off to the church entrance, stopping once to look back to check it out just one more time!

I nearly wet my pants!  The hubby smiled and looked at me and said, “I guess I’m not what they thought the groom would marry?”

We were both laughing so hard as we went in to the class event.  Since we didn’t actually walk in together, many weren’t sure who the bride was and kept looking at him.  Some of the new folks in the class were wondering since he fit the dress so well, if there was something they needed to know about this guy in the wedding dress!  Ahem, cough.

I still have the dress in it’s white bag after 30 years.  The side seam on the right is split a little as the “bride” that borrowed it back in 1990 was a little broader than I was.  Yet, it would be hard to get rid of the dress that has a double day memory!

The “lovely” Bride and Groom!
Nice dress, Ma’am..er…Sir?!

Yet it goes to show you that you just can’t judge a book by it’s cover.  Or a bride!
…and that’s all I have to say about that!
Tammy

DO YOUR SHOES MATCH?

Posted on by Tammy

Recently a dear friend of mine moved away.  I’ve been missing her terribly and was reminiscing about some of the many fun times we’ve had over the course of 34 years while doing errands the other day.  I found myself smiling a lot reflecting on these times.  Then I remembered an event we shared, which reminded me of an event at a previous job and I began to laugh in my car.  Yes, I became one of those crazy people you pull up to in a car at a red light and they are laughing out loud with nobody else in the car.  Hmm, although this seems to happen to me a lot!

A few years ago, this friend and I attended a Women’s Speaker event at her church.  She was involved with the planning of the event to bring this popular speaker in from across the country.  Since I had brought the same speaker to my church a few years before, the committee had included me in some of their planning meetings to help them with some of the little details, which I was excited to do.  Their committee worked hard organizing all those little details and the excitement was building for the event.

The big day finally arrives.  If any of you have been involved behind the scenes in a similar event, you know the feelings of getting everything together to make the day the best you possibly can for all the attendees.  In our hurriedness, we go at things one hundred miles a minute!  Sometimes, no matter how hard you prepare, they just don’t go smoothly.  Yet, it all boils down to how you handle it.  Do you go with the flow or do you become so frazzled that it becomes the proverbial snowball down the hill becoming larger and larger.

I purposely haven’t told you the topic the speaker was speaking on because, well, it would be like telling the punch line!

I’m sitting with my friend through the morning session.  Everything is going great.  It was a great first half of the day.  We do lunch, another success.  We have our break time, book signing then back to the last session of the day.

About half way through the afternoon, my friend leans over and whispers…”Can I tell you a secret?” I shake my head yes.  She then puts her two feet together and holds them up a little bit for me to see them both.  I gasp!  At this point, both of us can hardly contain ourselves.  She had a cute little outfit in navy and navy pumps.  Her shoes matched her outfit.  One problem.  They didn’t match each other!  They were both navy and they were both pumps.  But one was smooth and one was textured.  One was rather flat and the other had about a 1-1/2″ heel.

When we finally calm down enough to just a smile.  She then leans over to me again and whispers, “I was wondering why I was limping and my hip is starting to ache!”

Yep, we were gone!  Not only were we “Tickled Pink” I believe we were going into “Deep Fuchsia” from the laughter!  We were both laughing so hard that the bench sitting with us began to snicker in our inability to contain ourselves any longer.

As soon as the speaker concluded, we started laughing out loud and the entire row,  and those in front and back of us, wanted to know what was so funny.  My friend quickly grabbed my arm and said, “Don’t tell ’em, I made it all day without anyone noticing!”

I then had to tell her about my first job after college shoe experience.  I had a boss who was, um, different.  One day, as he arrived at 8:00 he zoomed into his office and closed the door.  I noticed his telephone light went on and I wondered if he was okay.  A minute or so later, he called me.  On the telephone, seriously?  I am ten steps from his desk chair.

He said, “Tammy, my wife will be bringing me a bag in about 30 minutes.  When she arrives in the lobby, they will buzz you as I’ve asked her to deliver it to you.”

I said, “Okay, you alright?”

He quietly said, “I will be.  Just bring me the bag when it arrives.”

Weird, I think.  What in the world is going on.  Finally, the receptionist calls me to come out to the lobby to pick up a package.  I go to the lobby.  For the first time ever, I meet my boss’s wife who is grinning from ear to ear.  She smiles and says, “These are for Paul, this is the other pair of shoes he wanted!”  At this she starts laughing and says, “Did he tell you why I had to come 30 minutes to bring these?”  I shake my head no.  She laughs and says as she leaves, “Make him tell you!”  Then she turns around and leaves, cackling all the way out the door.

I take them back to the office.  I knock on his door and he sticks his hand out the door to retrieve the bag.  Okay, so any of you who know me, you know I’m not handing over the goods now without an explanation!  I put the bag behind my back and say, “NO BAG!  SPILL IT!”  While hiding behind the door, he opens it and motions for me to come in, then shuts the door.  As the door shuts I can see them.  His shoes.

Oh my goodness!

One black wingtip, tie shoe.  One brown penny loafer.  Black plaid suit.  Hmm, I’m thinking his shoes don’t quite match his outfit!  

I try to be kind.  I make it about a minute while staring down at his shoes.  And then it happens!  I absolutely lose control and break into hysterical laughter.  He smiles and grabs the bag and proceeds to switch shoes.  I start laughing harder as he pauses and looks at the mis-matched pair in his hand.  I can’t help myself and I say, “You may want to pick the black one and go with that pair since you have a black suit on, you look confused.”

He smirks and says, “Ya think, smarty pants! Actually, I’m trying to figure out how I didn’t notice that one was a tie shoe and one was a slip-on and didn’t make the connection at home when I was getting dressed.”

We were both gone at that moment.

There you have it folks.  With all the hype of whether your shoe color matches your outfit.  Whether the style of shoe matches the style of outfit you have on.  That is important probably, but you really need to remember the first and foremost rule of style.  Do the SHOES actually match themselves?

….and that’s all I have to say about that!

Tammy
PS:  The speaker at the above Women’s Event was my friend, Emilie Barnes and her topic for the day was organization!  Having a home put together so you’re put together.